My hair is out of control

So I did something about it. I killed a chicken.



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Robert R sent this. And it’s my favorite animal taboot!

  By the way, do you know why a racoon washes his food? It’s because they don’t have saliva glands. At least that’s what I was told when I was young.

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This is amazing!

Check it out. Fred E alerted me to this fish story.

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Goodbye Ranger

It’s like saying so long to an old decrepit friend…

That’s the third vehicle I’ve given to the Salvation Army. They’ll never learn.

Speaking of my old Ranger, when Loinfruit was 16 he drove. The brakes went out, so I fixed them. When I had it up on ramps, Loinfruit decided that he’d change the oil. He crawled under the truck, and I told him that the drain plug is up towards the front, not where he was. I left and he changed the oil. About a week later I was driving it on I66 and GRIND THRASH THRASH THRASH… Right. He drained the transmission. That’s my boy! Takes after his old man.

Here’s a week from July of 2006:

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This is from July 2004. Dr. Pork has met his match…




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Bañana Mañana

OK. It’s like the damn avocado pits. Years ago you could stick some toothpicks in it and put the bottom in a jar of water, and, voila, you’d get a beautiful avocado tree. Those days are long gone. They irradiate avacados (and bananas) these days. Just about every thing you eat these days is radioactive. (OK, not really. The radiation goes away, so they tell me.)


Pretty sexy hair, huh? And it was the best pineapple I ever ate. It turned from green to yellow overnight. Absolutely as fresh as you could ever manger. Unless you lived in Hawaii.

Now let me show you something else:

Ok, the banana doesn’t look so hot. But it makes great fertilizer. Full of phosphorus.

Turns out the strip I posted Monday wasn’t part of Grandpa Fernwilter’s teeth caper. So today here are the Friday and Saturday strips:

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Pierre’s New Do

Pierre Gets a Tonette


By the way,  Florida State Representative Sabitini says that it’s unconstitutional to force people to wear face masks. By that reasoning it’s also unconstitutional to prohibit people to yell “FIRE” in a crowded theater.


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My banana plant

My banana plant isn’t doing real hot.

It’s probably the soil. Or maybe the water. Or maybe the location. Or bugs or something.


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Look what happened

Two days ago I made a video of Bob the Lizard on my green pineapple. Look what happened over night:

You didn’t believe me when I said that I was an ace horticulturist, did you? You can’t buy vine ripened pineapples like this at Safeway.

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Kids in School

Wouldn’t it be great if our Department of Education would provide home schooling materials for parents who don’t feel it’s safe to send their kids to school come September? If the situation here in Florida is as bad then as it is now, I certainly wouldn’t send my child to school. Even if children are not as badly affected as adults, they can still spread the virus. They can bring it home and give it to Mom and Dad and Grandma and Grandpa.


And now for something completely different…


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